Do Or Die

I wrote this in 2009. It is remarkably and very disappointingly on the mark for where I am today. I’ve got a good feeling about 2012, so, I am hopeful that when I come back in three years to read this post that I will not be wondering if it is do or die.

I am a procrastinator at heart. I never do anything until I absolutely have to. Fortunately, I generally think every day I have to do work or I’m going to get fired. So, that topic is covered. But, how does this procrastination affect the other things in my life?

I often tell myself that I’m going to save extra money every month, or at least, stick to my “budget”. I am rarely successful at this until it seems like I’ve got a month when I don’t know where all the money is going to come from. I tighten my belt for a while. Once the belt gets a little loose, I’m right back to splurging and so on. Fortunately, using automatic balance transfers helps minimize the damage.

Having kids has made me begin to grow up. I know that having kids allows you to be a kid but it’s also made me grow up. The first couple of birthday parties were so-so. I had planned to do this, that and the other thing, but, since I had procrastinated, I didn’t have the supplies and wasn’t prepared. I’ve learned that I can’t wait until the last minute if I want to put on the super, cool, ultimate, birthday party.

The benefit with the birthday party is a defined, written-in-stone deadline. How do I define my written-in-stone deadline? So many special events, birthdays, vacations, and summer bathing suits have passed when I had wanted to lose weight but didn’t. Because even though I had a target date, I didn’t really have a written-in-stone, now or never, do or die date. Do I really need to get to a do or die situation before I do this?

I’m trying to do a NO sugar and a NO deep fried foods streak this week. It dawned on me the other day that breaded chicken sandwiches are deep fried. I know, I know. Anyway, today, I was trying to justify getting a McChicken sandwich for lunch. The reason for NO deep fried foods streak was just to prevent fries and chips. But, I knew that deep down I was just trying to justify having something I knew I shouldn’t eat. I ask myself, “Do you really want this?” This means to live healthy, lose weight, and look good. What is it going to take to inspire me? What is it going to take to drive me?

I don’t want to wait until I am in a do or die situation. I don’t want to wait until diabetes is knocking on my door. I don’t want to wait until I’m two seconds from a heart attack. How do I know that I’m not already? How do I know I’m not already in a do or die situation?

I need to know deep down inside that if I don’t change my ways, I’m in a do or die situation. I need to believe I am in a do or die situation. Too many years have passed, too many special events have passed, and too many bathing suits have been passed by.

I don’t know how much time I’ve got left but procrastinating is just ruining the time I have now. If I don’t do this now then I’m just waiting to die.

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