I have been gagging on my food today. Let me tell you, the gagging isn’t caused by a threat of salmonell, the smell of pickled herring, or the dryness that comes from completely charred food.
I haven’t had a cookie in three days.
Or chocolate. Or ice cream. Or..
Yes, my body has gone into shock. If there was a microphone inside my body, this is what I think you’d hear..
EGADS! Where are the fricken cookies!!! Chicken?? Who does she think I am, Gracie Gold? This is ridiculous. I’ve been eating cookies everyday of my life. Not a thing wrong with me. If I don’t get some cookies this instant, I’ll go bang her head on the wall. Cookies!! Why, oh, Why can’t I have cookies!
Now repeat that but replace cookies with ice cream, chocolate, candy, donuts, and so on.
I wouldn’t recommend stepping into my office this week. I might barf this healthy chicken all over your shoes.